Redskins: A Booty Call No More

Siskel & Ebert gave Booty Call 2 Thumbs up?

It was what every NFL agent and every NFL player anxiously awaited, the middle of the night phone call from Ashburn, VA asking…do you want to come over? The agent and player might put up a soft fight for a little bit, “I don’t know it’s late, you know I’m sorta seeing the Giants right now.” But, they would be won over by the private plane rides and the wining, dining and …the money!

But, all is quiet at Ashburn this year and Redskins fans don’t quite know what to think. We, as fans, have been trained to expect the big name free agents to come to Redskins Park to not only visit, but to sign lucrative contracts that we can both praise and bitch about. This is the way things work, right? Not this year. Redskins One sits quietly at Dulles Airport and the pilots have had some unexpected time off. Agents are checking the batteries of their cell phones to make sure they are working properly, the free-agent tracker has nothing to track and Morton’s business is way off compared to last year.

The booty calls have been reversed and now it’s the agents calling and begging if their clients can come over. It’s the Redskins saying “you can, but I’ll tell you right now nothings going to happen.” The Morton’s steaks have been replaced with an intern placing an order at Chick Fil A. The private jet has been replaced by train and bus tickets. Terl’s dropping Randle El off at Union Station, he can pick up Willie Parker at the same time.

Ok, I am embellishing the story a little bit. Of course the Redskins brass is still going to dine at Morton’s or The Palm. But, by not making major changes so far in free agency, it proves that things have indeed majorly changed. It’s a new day at Redskins Park…so far that has meant addition by subtraction. And so far, I’m happy with that. The only possible free agent I personally liked was Darren Sproles, who never made it to free agency (I think the Redskins may have made a move on him had he become available.) I can’t shed any tears over the cuts the Redskins made, although I appreciate the time the players spent in burgundy and gold (except for Randle El.)

The Redskins still have major holes to fill and I expect they have a master plan on how to do that. It’s obviously a slow developing plan and not an immediate results plan, which tells me that Dan Snyder is not calling these shots. Again, addition by subtraction. But, I did hear that Dan called Vinny the other night in the wee hours of the night, just for old time sake…”you wanna come over?”

Cheers and Hail

Editors Note: While writing this post I realized I am so old that when I was a college aged kid making booty calls there were no cell phones, internet, email, texting or Skype. I had to do the 1 ring and hang up phone call technique, hoping that some chick would hear it and call me back. The moral of the story? Women should rejoice that I never had such forms of mass communication in my heyday, I would have been a drunken pain in the ass.

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