Archive for June, 2010

The Orioles Pass the Torch to the Nationals…The Buck Goes to Angelos

Photo via Mr. Irrelevant

In August of 1993 Peter Angelos and a group of investors bought the Orioles for $174 million dollars $173 million dollars. The final sale price was deducted by $1 million for legal work credited to Mr. Angelos’s law firm and he’s been skimming off the top ever since.

Well, here we are 17 years later and I think it’s safe to say the Orioles are at rock bottom. Steven Strasburg struck out 14 batters in his debut for the cross town rival Washington Nationals, an amazing start that had the whole NOVA/DC/MD area buzzing with excitement. Meanwhile, across town the Orioles were on their way to losing their 9th game in the last 10 contests. Even though the game was against the Yankees (the Orioles only draw crowds nowadays against the Yanks/Sox) the O’s game had an announced crowd of 23K, or half of the attendance for Strasburg’s debut. Strasburg’s 14 strikeouts almost equaled the Orioles win total thru 1/3 of the season…16. The crazy thing is the Nationals newfound success is making Peter a ton of money, he owns the Nationals cable rights.

When Cal went, so did the fans…foreshadowing perhaps?

Cal hung up his spikes nearly 10 years ago. The Orioles are on pace to win 44 games, a record that would challenge the 2003 Tigers for the worst modern day record in MLB history, yes the Orioles are that BAD! Jon Miller is gone…his voice now serenading Giant’s fans ears. The Orioles best players of the early 2000’s are tainted by steroids. Brian Roberts is hurt, Adam Jones has regressed and Nick Markakis has lost his power. 13 straight years of losing. The Nationals have Zimmerman, Strasburg, a fanatic fan base, a possible pennant race…and Harper on the way. It’s safe to say that there’s a new sheriff in town.

It’s over Peter, it’s over. The Orioles are now reduced to being a laughingstock. However, the franchise is now worth more money than ever and your 80 freaking years old. SELL THE TEAM.

Forbes says you can get $376 million for the team, more than double what you paid…not a bad deal. Plus, I’m sure your law firm can collect another $5 million or so in legal fees.

Cheers and Hail

Fatpickled The Magazine

ESPN did it. Oprah did it. I’m proud to announce Fatpickled The Magazine has been added to my media empire. For advertising and subscriptions contact me directly. Future issues will include the following stories:

Drinking With Cuth by John Riggins

The Night I Banged Alice Sweet by Earl Weaver

101 Things To Do With Sausage by Porkboy

7-9, A Short Autobiography by Norv Turner

How To Treat Your Man by Tony Romo

Look for Fatpickled on a newstand near you! (Click on the picture to enlarge.)

Cheers and Hail

Happy Bday Larry Centers & Santana Moss

Happy birthday Santana Moss. Santana is entering his 6th season as a Washington Redskin. He has averaged 70 receptions and 1,005 yards a season in DC, pretty solid numbers. Despite playing banged up a lot and being an undersized WR, Santana has missed just 4 games in the past 5 years which happens to be the number of games he may be suspended to start the 2010 season (hopefully not.) Santana will most likely crack the Redskins all-time top 5 career leaders in both receptions and yardage during the 2010 season. He’s provided many big time and memorable plays in his career, below are some highlights of those plays. Happy 31st Mr. Moss.

Happy birthday Larry Centers. Larry played 2 seasons for the Redskins from 1999-2000, appearing in 31 games. #37 caught 150 balls in those 2 seasons, none bigger than the 33 yard TD in overtime against the 49ers that clinched the 99′ NFC East title for the Skins. The 3-time Pro Bowler holds the record for most career receptions by a running back with 827. I still rembemer the bizarre experience Larry encountered at the Pro Bowl in 1996…some say it was a religious experience or he was momentarily posessed like in the Exorcist…my guess is he was tripping on some serious drugs. Happy 42nd Mr. Centers.

Cheers and Hail