A Rod REALLY Likes Himself

WTF???

Now I know when you do a photo shoot, the photographer asks you to loosen and up and “strike a pose,” (Madonna pun intended.) Apparently after a couple shots of Patron, Alex likes to make a “booty call” to himself.

Alex: “ooohh, you look so sexy”

Alex: “come here here my big ball of testosterone Latin love”

These pictures were taken for an article in Details magazine. After the interview and photo shoot, Alex called back the author of the story to plead with him not to release Alex’s favorite Madonna song in the article. A-Fraud feared the backlash of hearing the song played at opposing stadiums. I think he’s already given Red Sox and O’s fans enough ammunition (a couple of blow up dolls with #13 Yankee jerseys would be a good start.)

Well, he’s got a couple of months to be alone with himself as he recovers from the surgery to remove the cyst on his hip. Don’t cyst form where needles are repeatedly are used?

Sheriff Cooley Winners And IMDB Challenge

This post originally appeared at The Cooley Zone

Thanks to everyone who participated in the “Sheriff Cooley” contest, it was an awesome response and there were a lot of great ideas. One of the coolest things about blogging is the interaction and thoughts that are spurred from each post. For instance, we have learned that taking a picture of your private parts results in about a million hits and late night talk show monolgues. Talking derogatory about a rival hockey player results in the steel city breaking bad on you personally, and some of the worst photoshopping I’ve ever seen. (Some dude actually looked up gay porn for the one picture, how’d he even know where to find it?)

That being said, the “sheriff” posts didn’t cause that kind of riot. It did however cause some serious movement on the IMDB Starmeters for those involved. The Starmeter ranks every actor listed on IMDB, based upon the searches for them on the site. Here is the effect that you guys had on the participants of the post in the week that the post came out.

Alex Karras moved from # 7,597(I was surprised he was that high) to #3,203

Chris Cooley moved from #246,368 to #165,712 (surging past Flo, the waitress from Dumb and Dumber)

Tanner Cooley moved from #1,015,929 to #358,918 (surging past Art Monk, who could forget his role in Jerry Maguire, “nice game Rod”)

I think we are better than this, so I’m challenging you to go to work on IMDB, searching Alex, Chris, and Tanner and moving them up the Hollywood ladder. Here are the goals I’ve set for us to reach in the next week (help us baby jesus, help us Tom Cruise, help us Maxim.com!)

Alex #1899 - 1 spot above Eugene Levy

Chris #29,967 - 1 spot above Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake

Tanner # 69,569 - 1 spot above legenday Sportscaster George Michael (who could forget him in Silence of the Lambs, I sure haven’t and I remind him whenever I see him.)

Here are the winners from the contest. You can claim your prize by venturing over to my site http://www.fatpickled.com/, bookmark it to your favorites, then email me.

1st place - And winner of a signed 8×10 of Fatpickle is…Randow who came up with the combination of Pat (from It’s Pat) and Gridiron.

2nd place - And winner of a signed 8×10 of Vladimir is…Xstatic4beer who not only has an awesome handle, but also gave us Uncle Buck and Big Wig.

3rd place - And the winner of a signed 8×10 of the man currently over 150,000spots behind Paula Deen on the Starmeter(in his defense she can do things with a green bean that is heaven) is…Tony Corsini who brought us Spicoli and The Helmet Knocker.

Congrats to all, there was some really good ones and it was a difficult choice.

I’ll be back sometime next week to I reveal how we did in the IMDB challenge, and to talk about Redskins fans just like you and I (well kind of.)

Update!! Chris moved up to 33,803, Tanner moved up to 52,307

Cheers and Hail

Six Degrees Of Fatpickled

GO TERPS!!!!

The AP released a report about the NFL players lost in the Gulf.

Sidney Ponson and the O’s agree to a buy-out, 4 years later

Seth Rogen went #3…bacon explosion?

Cutler is moving on, who’s to blame?

You can lick a thousand kitties, but you suck 1…which Cowboy went down?

25 random things about Mel Kiper

5,4,3,2,1,…

We’ve all played the game, there’s 5 seconds left on the clock when you receive the inbounds pass. A head fake and a couple dribbles later you throw up the final shot and……clank? Well, even if you made it you were the only one who saw it. Usually you miss, try for the follow up shot (miss,) and play it back again.

Enjoy Tommy Boy himself imitating Christian Laettner. (and look forward to March Madness)

Cheers and Hail

Introducing…

The following group of NBA players are those that I believe to be the most humble in the league. I’m positive that they thank God everyday for the basketball talent he has blessed them with. Because without the size and athletic ability that has allowed them to make millions of dollars, there is no way they could be pulling in the broads they do on a nightly basis.

Introducing…The NBA First Team All Ugly

C - George Muresan - Michael Phelps?

PF - Tyrone Hill - If you were ever to see the 76er’s play when he did, I can only pray you didn’t have floor seats

SF - Tyshaun Prince

SG - Delante West

PG - Sam Cassell - Quite possibly the from a different planet

Sixth Man Award
Andrei Kirilenko - He deserves this award mainly because his wife reportedly allows him one free “bang pass” a year as long as she is in the room watching. Nobody was more mad than Jerry Sloan when hearing he has repeatedly used this pass on John Amechi.


Coach of the Year
Stan Van Gundy - Just pretend

Rookie of the Year
Greg Oden

All-Time MVP
Reggie Miller

Until Next Time,
E4three32